I want to be rich, I really really do.
My father grew up dirt poor. Scrapping to fight for food being the 5th of 7 brothers and stealing apples to stave off hunger, he is an incredible rags to riches story. He was an entrepreneur and owned over a dozen businesses (mostly restaurants) in the Hampton Roads area of Virginia. With that success he sent me to the wealthiest private school in our area where I was one of ~5 Asians in our grade, 2 of which just happened to be my cousins Amy and Kathy. Surrounded by my own family wealth and the wealth of my peers, I have grown to like nice things.
I want to eat great food... everyday if possible, including lots of sushi and oysters and steaks and on and on and on. Drink amazing whisky. I want to travel. I want to tinker with the latest gadgets like 3D printers, Android Wear watches, Amazon Echo, Google Glass (well not anymore), etc. I did everything I was supposed to do to achieve this goal. I went to a decent university (Carnegie Mellon University). Worked my way and got promoted at every job I was at, climbed the ladder to become a VP at an incredible hyper-growth retail company. Living the American dream.
Now in the Bay Area, working on whatever I'm doing, I'm surrounded by wealth. Crazy multi-story mansions in the heart of SF, day trips to Tokyo to eat Jiro's, private planes, eating $300 sushi meals whenever they want (that's really what I want in life), people gots the moolah. I love this stuff and love enjoying these things with them when I can.
But then I'm faced with this cold hard fact: The poor are only the poor because there are the rich.
I'm not here to argue economics, I'll save that for another day. The reality is that if we all had the same amount there would be no poor. Just US. But you can read this article that discusses wealth inequality. Article here
My question is what do I do about it? Is inequality MY problem? There are so many things I would do that feel totally justified if I had more money:
- Send my daughter to a better school by moving to a better school district
- Change the belts on my 10 year old car b/c they warned me if I wait and they break, its GG
- Move into a bigger place so I can have an office since I work from home and usually work from my bed
Forget the luxuries of the super wealthy, but purely for my own livelihood I want to do these things which don't seem that bad, so is inequality really MY problem? I've worked hard to get where I'm at. I've spent time in the inner cities and there are many people who don't work hard so aren't they getting what they deserve? Why do I need to make sacrifices? Shouldn't the Top 1% (which owns almost more wealth than the other 99%) be accountable to redistribute their wealth to fix this problem?
The fastest way I've embraced this to BE MY problem has been to become friends and family to those in the Tenderloin and East Palo Alto. Because "Ohana" means "family", and family means no one gets left behind. (Any Lilo and Stitch fans in here?) Issiah and Cathie and Paul and Athena and Linda and Lisa and Jasmine, they become family to me. Their lives matter.
Since I started TLMade 2 years ago, many people ask me what does the Tenderloin need? I always give the same answer:
Relationships
If every person in San Francisco reached out to build a genuine friendship with 1 person in the Tenderloin, our problems would be solved and millions upon millions of tax dollars saved and millions upon millions of donors could keep their money too.
The problem of the inner city isn't financial, its relational. Many people are there for drugs, various addictions too. Addictions and other issues have isolated them from their families, friends, and communities. In East Palo Alto where generational poverty is the problem, these families are isolated in a different way. No relationships with anyone OTR (over the ramp, what EPA people call the area past 101 in Menlo Park and Palo Alto). They don't have perspectives on education and job opportunities outside of their community.
Many of these issues are overcome when people live in community and form strong relational bonds. Maybe some hesitate thinking it'll be a financial burden, but that's completely wrong. We don't give money to family members in different financial situations than us, that never works. We just walk life together. When we walk with someone, they teach us and we teach them. That becomes true riches in life.
I've learned an amazing meal or experience or traveling to a new place, these things last for a moment. We experience it and its gone. I wish I could have certain pieces of O-Toro or Ikura or amazing Udon linger on my taste buds forever but we can't. They come and go in a flash. But relationships are invaluable. The people I care about, trust, want to grow old together with, these to me are truly valuable.